Sunday, September 8, 2013

In 2013 would Noah have drowned?

If Noah were alive today and it started to rain the ultimate survival of life on earth could very well be in doubt!

Unfortunately if God came to Noah today and commanded him to build an Ark, according to this hypothetical story all living things could very well perish!


In the year 2013, the Lord came unto Noah and  said:
Once again the earth has become wicked and over-populated,
and I see the end of all flesh before  me.

Build another Ark and save 2 of every living thing
along with a few good humans.

He gave Noah the blueprints, saying:
'You have 6 months to build the Ark before I will  start
the unending rain for 40 days and 40  nights.'

Six months later, the Lord looked down and saw Noah weeping in his yard -
But, no Ark..
Noah! He roared, I'm about to start the rain! Where is the Ark?
'Forgive  me, Lord', begged Noah, 'but things have changed'.

Firstly, I needed a building permit before I was allowed to start.

Then I had a long argument with the building inspector over the need for a sprinkler system.

My neighbors claimed that I've violated the neighborhood zoning laws by building the Ark in my yard, and that the Ark would be exceeding the height limitations. We had to go to the Development Appeal Board for a decision.

Then, the Department of Transportation demanded a bond be posted for the future costs of moving power lines and other overhead obstructions, to clear the passage for the Ark 's move to the sea. I told them that the sea would be coming to us, but they would hear nothing of it.

Getting the wood was another problem. There's a ban on cutting local trees in order to save the spotted owl. I tried to convince the environmentalists that I needed the wood to save the owls - but no go!

When I started gathering the animals, an animal rights group sued me. They insisted that I was confining wild animals against their will. They argued that accommodations were too restrictive, and that it is cruel and inhumane to put so many animals in a confined space.

Then  the EPA ruled that I couldn't build the Ark until they'd conducted an environmental
impact study on your proposed flood.

I'm still trying to resolve a complaint with the Human Rights Commission on how many
minorities I'm supposed to hire for my building crew.

Immigration is checking the status of most of the people who want to work.

The trades unions say I can't use my sons. They insist I have to hire only union
workers with Ark-building experience.

To make matters worse, they seized all my assets, claiming
I'm trying to leave the country illegally with endangered species.

So, forgive me, Lord, but it would take at least 10 years for me to finish this Ark.

Suddenly the skies cleared, the sun began to shine, and a double rainbow stretched across the sky.

Noah looked up in wonder and asked, 'You mean you're not going to destroy the world?'

'No,' said the Lord.

'Your government beat me to it.

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